For those of you not working in libraries, you really are missing out on some of the most interesting (and embarassing) conversations you could have with a complete stranger.
Another interesting conversation with an older lady. She's only 58, not really old by today's standards. To tell you the truth, she looked older. I'm thinking she must have had a hard life, but she has a good spirit, and I don't believe any subject is taboo with her.
After being sent to the library from another nearby library, she comes to the desk looking for a couple of books handwritten on a list. A brief look indicates books about menopause. (I should have looked closer.) We walk to the books on women and health and she asks, "are there books about men here?"
I'm thinking, "men? I thought you were interested in menopause?"
"Are you looking for books about men or about menopause?" (I should have just directed her to the books on men, but then I didn't know exactly what she wanted to know about men.)
Here's her lovely response (and it doens't stop here.)
"Well, I don't mean to be gross or rude, but my boyfriend... sometimes he ejaculates and sometimes he doesn't. I just found out that men go through menopause and I want to know more about it. I want to know if I'm the reason why he's not ejaculating, or is it physical."
Oh my God!!!!! Do I know how to get them or what?
"Okay. So you are looking for essentially men's health. Information about male menopause and impotency. Alrighty then. Let's see what we can find."
(Occassionally I'll receive those questions where I try to detach myself from the person. Just focus on the question. Don't go past the question. Find the answers.)
So, we are looking through men's health, which is also around women's health and some sex books. Most of our sex books have been stolen. (They were educational sex books. So don't get any ideas.) She decides to continue talking. She's a friendly lady, though too much information comes out of her mouth. She tells me her boyfriend is 62. And at the time she told me that I couldn't help but think, "my dad is around that age. NO! NO! Don't think it. Don't think it. My parents don't have sex." No one wants to imagine their parents having sex. As far as I'm concerned my parents had sex 3 times - once for me and once for my sister, and their honeymoon. In my mind, I know it's more, but I don't want to think about it. And I don't like hearing those little statements that slip from my mom's mouth about sex. I don't want to think about it.
This whole reference transaction is just, I don't know, I can't explain it, but just too much. But it doesn't stop.
"You know, I didn't have sex for five years when I met him. I didn't realize I would dry up. It's like having sex with sandpaper."
Oh holy night! Is this going to stop?
"We have this stuff that I just hate and find embarrassing to use. What's that stuff called?"
"KY Jelly," I said in my mind.
"Jelly. KY Jelly. I hate that stuff. It's embarrassing to use. He doesn't mind it. My doctor (female) tells me to rub some on him and he would like it. She said that. That's not me. I'm old-fashioned."
"As if telling me all this is old-fashioned." (By this time I'm holding my head in my hands.)
"Well, I can see I've embarrassed you."
Hell yes, she has.
"I'm going to go now. Thank you for your help."
"You're welcome, have a good day."
I was going to tell her to have a good night also, but who knows where that statement would lead to. Just so you know this conversation lasted about 20 minutes or more. I just highlighted the interesting parts.
No comments:
Post a Comment