Finally feeling Settled

So I'm finally feeling settled here in Ohio. Still not too keen about the Ohio shoppers, but I don't have the desperate desire to return to my home state. I still miss my family and friends there, but I like the feeling of independence here.

You can't force yourself to like a new place. There may come a time when you will, but it can't be force. You'll probably hate your new surroundings even more it you force it on yourself. I'm learing to take my time and see what Ohio has to offer. The important part is knowing how happy you are. If you're not happy with yourself, you won't be happy any where. Location isn't going to change that.

I have to say, when I first moved up here, there was nothing that I liked. The locals would praise some of the various shops around here. Particularly one bookstore. And I love bookstores. Especially used book stores. I still haven't found a really good used bookstore. I think I'll have to travel a bit for that one. The locals love the bookstore Books and Company. Everyone I talk to has good things to say about it. I'm expecting this wonderful bookstore. In my mind I'm thinking that it's huge and has all sorts of books. Maybe something more from what everyone tells me. All I could say was, "this is it?" I have to say, I was disappointed. I come from a city where the independent bookstore was two stories. The place was huge and wonderful. It didn't have the used books I like to buy, but it had everything else. New books, books signed by the authors, stationary and cards, children's section with tons of books, a cafe where you could have dinner and dessert, magazine section, music section, and plenty of chairs and benches to sit down and read. Special displays were set up for different occassions. I miss the place terribly. Just in case you are curious, it's Joseph - Beth Booksellers. JoeBeth for short. Everyone in town knows about it.

My anxiety about living here has faded. Maybe that was my big problem. There was too much anxiety flowing through my veins. I feel more calm.

My next problem is how to answer my family and friends when they tell me of job openings in my home state. They still want me to return. My answer has always been, "now is not the right time." And it's true. As much as I wanted to stay in my home state, the job opening here felt right. Moving here felt right. I can't explain it accept to say it's instinct. That's the same feeling I have to stay here in Ohio right now.

I hoping to buy a house in the future up here. I'm tired of living in a small apartment. Sometime soon hopefully.

Nothing new

Not much to report today. At least nothing that I want to vocalize. Sorry folks. Have a good day everyone.

She created a monster

My friend may regret ever taking me to a sex toy shop. I wonder if she thinks she created a monster.

I am a relatively modest and shy person. (Believe what I say and not as I do.) A couple of years ago, my friend decided to take me to a local sex shop. Her whole purpose was to see how embarassed I would become. I knew she was doing it for that reason. No matter, I'll do it. I wasn't going to back down.

This was one of those establishments where you walk in the back door, and up the stairs. Once upstairs you see a wall of sex novelites (dildos, vibrators, and etc.) There are dvds to rent and magazines to buy. I think I held up fairly well. I walked around for about 10 minutes (with her right by my side) before I said, "ok, I'm ready to go."

A couple of weeks go by, I call her up and say, "let's go back. I want something."

She was shocked by my request, "are you sure you want to do this?"

That started it all.

Now she thinks I'm the expert on sex toys. It's true that I can tell her, "that one's no good." But I wouldn't call myself an expert. I've just become a little more bold. I've walked into sex shops on my own and bought something. I've also walked in alone, notice only guys were there (one was learing at me), and walked back out.

In my experience, you don't really look at the other people who are shopping there. But this past weekend I couldn't help but watch the other individuals shopping. Now this particular story was classier than the first I went to. But to tell you the truth, I'd rather shop at Hustler of Hollywood. Shocking, but true. A big picture of Larry Flynt greets you at the door. Their motto is, "Relax, it's just sex." Anyways, back to this weekend.

There were two couples that I watched how they interacted with one another. They were in their forties or fifties, and all four of them knew each other. They all stayed together, the women were going from dildo to vibrator to clit ticklers making comments about each one. Comments such as "I like this one," "this one may be good." Stuff like that. The men stayed back a little bit but where still much apart of looking at the toys.

I couldn't help but wonder how well these couples know each other. It's one thing to go shopping at a sex store with your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife, but I figure it would be another thing to shop with another couple. Makes you wonder what's going on?

I May have Over Reacted

I'm only human. I think my termite problem is just a winged ant problem. It's always good to admit when you are wrong. So, I'm admitting it. I take back every "... my ass" thought that I had towards the worker in management.

p.s. - i'm glad i didn't spend too much money on plastic containers.

I'm switching to Plastic

I'm going to make everything in my apartment plastic. Yep, it's all going to be plasic. I came in contact with my first termite on Saturday. I had a full body shiver when I was told that it's probably a termite. Aaargh!!! In my apartment. In my bedroom no less!!! Aaargh!!

I'm lounging in my bed, watching my cat look out the window, (Hey, it's better than watching fish.) when I see what looks to be a fly on the window. I'm not bothered by flys. Open the window, let them out. Then I happen to see another fly emerge. From a crack in the window sill. I'm thinking, "where did that one come from?" So I get up to look. There's a big crack (kinda shows that this apartment was "thrown together" rather than correctly built). There are ants crawling around, and these winged insects don't look like flies.

I immediately grab some ant bait, left over from a couple of months ago when I saw ants crawling around my bathroom floor. (I swear I keep this place fairly clean. They're in the walls. I swear it.) Place the bait on the two corners of the window sill and watch them come to the sweet poison. "Die! Die! Die! Take that poison to your queen mother and colony, and Die!" Once upon a time I liked ants, then I turned four years old.

Next I call my sister, or was it my parents.... It was my parents. Told them what looked to be flies, but I knew they weren't. "Seems like you may have termites," they tell me. Aaargh! Knowing that just makes you want to cringe and scratch all over. At least I know for a fact, that it's nothing I did.

Well, I have plans to visit a friend in Kentucky, and I want this taken care of without having to worry about my cat. (There are other things to worry about in regards to my cat when I leave him alone. Like peeing somewhere besides the litter box.) I clean my room of everything. The bed sheets are gone, the clothing, pillows, everything. I know they are more interested in the wood, but I had to get what I could out of there. I kill what ants and termites I can and leave. I know that's not going to take care of the problem, but I can't do anything right now. My only option is to tell the management of the apartment complex.

Nine o'clock finally arrives and I'm off to the apartment complex office. Two girls are working. They must be assistants, because the manager is off working on something else.

"Can I help you with anything?" one girl asks. (She's bound to be early 20's)

"Yes, I want to report there are ants crawling around my bedroom window sill, and possibly termites. I've done what I can now for the ants and laid out bait for them, but I wanted you to know about the termites."

"That's not possible," she tells me.

Not possible my ass. "These things look like flying ants, but I know they aren't. They have thin, long bodies, with wings, and they are flying around."

"They're probably silver fish."

Silver fish my ass. Do you even know what silver fish look like. Those are harmless.
"Listen I'm pretty sure they are termites."

"Well we can't call the exterminator until Monday or Tuesday."

Damn it.

So most of the time I'm in Kentucky, I'm thinking about about these ants and termites having fun in my bedroom. I'm thinking in my head about what I want to say to the manager, "They are a bother to me, but they'll wreck havoc on your apartment complex."

So I come home to see what's happened. I only see one or two ants walking around. That was something I expected. But it definatley wasn't the amount on Saturday. I don't see the termites on my window. In my mind, I know they aren't gone. I soon find a couple walking on the carpet under the window. So what do I do? There's a reason why I've kept old pickle jars. I'm catching them and taking them straight over to the office tomorrow morning.

"They're probably silver fish." Hell no. These are not silver fish. Examine the evidence girls. I've even taken pictures of the cracks on my window sills. I probably should have reported that earlier. Hind sight is 20/20.

Now I can't sleep in my room tonight. I know they aren't interested in me, but in the wood. But, aargh! How can I sleep in there. It's the couch for me tonight.